Did anyone ever have the enduring delight of Dehydrated meat ?
In Bone (Anaba) North Africa, is was learned that in order to save space in the Merchant ships bringing us food and sustenance from the U.K. In U Boat infested waters, the Army Kitchens in their quest for medals had developed a procedure to “Dehydrate” meat thus reducing it’s bulk for transportation. On arrival at the consuming kitchens overseas it was therefore subject to yet another procedure
to regain it’s initial bulk. These procedures were quite naturally, subject to the Official secrets act of 1938 sect 5 – para 6 – line 9. So we were completely in innocence of the effects of these procedures at any stage of the development.
The day duly arrived when we were served – it must be said – lavish proportions of this new development in the progress of man, to which all and sundry enjoyed, or at least the enjoyment was apparent inasmuch as the Orderly Officer heard NO complaints. It should be noted that the Orderly Officer that day was the strapping 6’4” – 250 pound, South Africa International Rugby player, Captain Christopher Newton – Thompson M.C.
It should also be noted that the Latrine was a gold standard version of those things which had been hand made and sandpapered by a journeyman joiner, who doubled as tank gunner for the writers crew.
It was later in the early evening when the aforesaid Dehydrated meat had a most unusual effect . Our gold standard latrine was in overdrive for some time with some victims not making it all the way, and the evidence was masked by the onset of sudden darkness which happens in the lea of the Atlas Mountains.
The senior Non Commissioned Officers of our squadron invariably ate their dinners as only gentlemen should, later than the other ranks and therefore were somewhat in ignorance of the trials and tribulations which had befallen the rankers earlier and so when they felt the necessary urge to visit the latrine – the overstrained main beam broke with a mighty crack and allowed the Squadron Sergeant Major – the Squadron QMS – the Squadron Sergeant Cook and the REME Sergeant Fitter to land in the mire, shall we say.
Hidden smiles broke out all over the regiment for the next few days and many blue pencils were wasted on letters home. Strangely – it was the last time we saw that meat !
Lambs hearts smothered with a liquid of indeterminate origin on a cold tin plate was quite another thing for breakfast !